The Beginning

Trying. Trying to work it all out. Trying to heal. Trying to find a reason to love myself. Trying to get off AD's. Horrible process. Withdrawal sucks. Praying. Praying. Just want t0 know if normal exists, or does everyone feel like this, just in their own way. Hatred of self. Hatred of life. Hatred of being. Paranoid, or do people REALLY think I am weird. Left out. Left behind. Left. I trust NO ONE. Do you hear me? I am screaming it....I DO NOT TRUST YOU. Don't act hurt. You know you don't deserve my trust. You know in half a second that you'd betray me, so no I do NOT trust you.